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Q&A With a Parent
Why become one?
As someone who never wanted children — it just didn’t interest me — I’ve always been a little confused by the dissection of women who don’t want children, because it suggests there’s something curious about choosing to continue going on with life as normal. But I find the decision to overhaul one’s life and invite the many risks of parenthood much more interesting.
Which is why I’ve always wanted to interview happy (rather than regretful) parents. I genuinely want to know why they had kids, how much thought they gave it before doing it, whether or how it changed their lives, and would they do it again?
I choose happy over regretful parents because anyone can visit the regretful parents Reddit and spend hours reading tragic stories of people who were duped by pronatalist messaging, pressured by people around them, or simply naïve and who hate parenthood. But that’s an extreme; the other extreme, delivered on TV and in movies and books, is the “happy” parent for whom the trials are minor and the rewards are glowy and great.
But what about the real-life happy parents? What motivated them to change their lives, and what’s their experience like? What is all the pronatalist messaging not saying?
I asked two parents if they would be willing to answer some questions, and they said yes. This is the first one.
